Saturday, December 31, 2011

Details

I was reflecting today on my past year in my journal. I wrote down each month and a little summary  beside of what has happened. I was
                                    blown away.
Almost every month, something challenging happened. Almost every month, something very rich happened. For example... in March, I went to Spain on a vision trip over Spring break. We spent time visiting with the missionaries and learning about Spain. I barely slept while I was on that trip, and I remember feeling very weighted by the hopelessness I felt in the place... Less than 1/2 a percent of Spain professes Christianity. I also remember being very aware of my own sinfulness. I came back from the trip and got sick and depressed for the next two weeks, and I really missed being in Spain. I am so grateful that God allowed me to go on that trip, and become even more aware of the way that He is at work around the world. I think that trip is still being processed and I don't know how God will use it in my life. 
Lunch at Chery Flores and Alba Miller's flat (a couple of the missionaries)

The view from their window

     Another obvious example of richness/hardness--> my trip to Hong Kong this summer to teach English. Most of life's richness can be found in the details, and the details are much more obvious when you travel to a new country. (I LOVE TO TRAVEL!) You can't help but notice the difference from the details you are used to... making not only new details but also familiar ones so...delightful! I miss all of the details from there! Eating sushi and dim sum with chopsticks, Chinese and UVA-protected umbrellas, the way that Dannie's (one of my students) little grinchy laugh sounded whenever she was happy (so precious!). 
     I wasn't really expecting hardness, even though I suppose I always should by now! I asked for growth, and growth happens after a seed has split apart and died. Going to Hong Kong was a slap in the face for me, because God reminded me that my going to Hong Kong was not about going on an adventure in my story... I have always been far too interested in my own story. It's not about my story, but about His! I need to trust Him, and simply be honored and astounded that He even let's me be a part of His. Teaching was such a hard thing for me! I am not naturally good at teaching! I was as happy or happier than the kids when class time was over! And they had just received summer freedom only to have their parents send them to English camp from 9:00 AM-4:00 PM every day for 3 weeks. I would wake up in dread. I remember praying in the bathroom, telling God that He had to give me joy, patience, love that I didn't have, because I felt completely empty. And He really would...as soon as I was in the classroom and began to teach, I almost enjoyed myself (almost). Does it really matter that I hated to teach? I know that teaching isn't my gifting and that I won't pursue it as a life-long career. But how else would I have had the chance to get to know those kids? More than anything, I loved those precious little faces and the friendships that came from all the hours we had in class. Every day, I couldn't wait for lunch, because each day different groups of students wanted to go out to lunch with us, their teachers. 
Little Details again-- SOY MILK IN HK!!! They have a different one for every moment... ;)

My Team, who I spent 5 weeks with :D This is a familiar setting as we had many team meetings and planned lessons at Pacific Coffee

Details again- Japanese beef curry. 

This was one of my favorite days...

Teary goodbyes...

Their faces are beautiful, I love them!

I love the details. 


Right now, I am watching my three-year-old niece dance in her fancy little dress. She has been so excited to go to Rachel Rhodes' wedding because my brother-in-law told her he would dance with her there tonight. She can't wait to dance with her daddy...
     "I'm ready to dance!" She announced when she entered the room and began to leap and twirl about the room. 
     Death and Joy... That's what I asked God to teach me about this next year. I'm a little nervous, but excited at the same time. Deaths of seeds allow for Growth! Happy New Year to all of you, and pray that it would be a growth-filled, joyous year for you as well.

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Richness

I am actually excited about blogging! Communication has definitely been a struggle this past semester. I have the feeling that blogging is going to a be a little addicting... :)

Here I am, back at Covenant after an incredible fall break that included staying at Natalie and Josh's house 2 nights as well as going to GUATEMALA for 5 days!!! I can't express the incredible richness and sweetness of that time-- It was so good and necessary for my soul. Just to soak in my family, see new beautiful sights like Antigua and the Presidential Palace, have cozy conversations in Kara's homey apartment... I loved it.

It was hard to drive back to school and have an overwhelming load of homework dumped on my head as well as class to go that same day. I told Mom on the phone that I was tired of it already and she told me to pray for a miracle. I feel a miracle in my heart as God once again gives me strength and motivation that I don't have. I am so grateful for this Sunday afternoon in front of me to rest and reflect... I am about to go for a hike with Mary Grace in the brilliant sunshine and sit and read and write for a while.

Let me explain the title of this blog! I feel like "Life in Process" is appropriate  because I am always processing something huge in my head and heart as well as externally (aren't we all?), and now I can let you all be a part of it :).

Right now I am processing what it means
to REST in God
to find LIFE in Him
to walk INTIMATELY with Him

I'm also processing what it means to come back to this country again. I find myself thinking negatively about the States -- still -- after it seems like I should have already adjusted back and consider this my country now. I feel life in learning and discovering new things, and I have so much of the world that I want to have the chance to explore! Natalie reminded me the other night that we can never know when one season of life will be over, so all the more reason to dig in and enjoy every stage. Life is too rich!



Kara and her cooking is so delightfully inspiring...



Packing into the car for our trip to Antigua!



I love my Daddy <3




Con los cuñados ;)





One of my favorites... I like to think that the windows of my soul are also stained glass.